Ohhh there's so many things I long to do! Exercise for example! I long for my daily walks where I cleared my head and got my blood pumping!
With Alexis walking in a turtle speed, exploring every rock on the road and Leon in the pram it's not much muscle work going on and I can just feel how my body scream for some heart beat! This Sunday I took a short walk around the block in the spring atmosphere and it felt so liberating! Pilates, pulse vibrating walks, spinning on my Orbitreck in front of a SATC episode or something else easy going, 20min long and fun/amusing - well it sounds like music to me!
After these two close pregnancies (two in three years), I hardly put on any weight after, which I'm of course happy for, but the texture needs to get better and I always love when my body feels strong, vital and toned without loosing too much curves. At the moment I more feel like a body with soft tissue on ... We need to help it a little on the way. I just wish that the top part of my body (you know what I mean) would have kept some volume, but my two little boys took the best of it for sure ... morr ...
How do you work out? Did your body change much after having children?
(new cashmere sweater in a beautiful purple: here)
Happy international women's day to my female readers out there! (I wrote this post yesterday but didn't have time to publish it.)
The post below created so much hate and negativism, I had to refuse to publish some of the most inappropriate comments at the end, it just escalated insanely! There's some crazy people out there, that's for sure. And some reacts on the fact that I actually respond to some of them?! A year back I wouldn't. By then I just ignored those who wrote something foolish and just out of proportions cruel - but the experience have made my tongue and mind sharper and I will for sure not take any bullshit for no reason.
I should probably be more aware of haters like that, since I have a public blog, cause I realise I easily drive some women demented by just breathing. Like someone wrote; be happy, it drives people nuts!
The reactions actually blow me out of surprise! I posted the same one on my Instagram account and about 200 followers loved it and totally got my point! Perhaps they just saw it for what it was; a reminder to have fun, to do what you want and rather be bold and take a risk then stopping yourself from a life extraordinary in experiences, destines, possibilities or whatever it may be.
For me it only proves how far we still are from coaching each other forward rather then judging and destroying. Suddenly it was more about different icons, decades back or me being a stay at home mother for the moment (I mean, Leon is only six month old), my finances or other non related matters, then the actual meaning of the sentence in the beginning.
It must have been something in those simple words who got into some of you in a less positive way then they intended. A human that feels scared or intimated, can't recognise themselves or wants everyone to be the same, is dangerous. That is nothing new. I just wonder why some took it so serious or wanted me to sort of prove that I had a darker side.
I want us to enhance versatility among us, spread the power of being proud of who you are instead of trying to live up to an ideal of what someone expect you to be or what you think you need to be able to fit it.
The best things in life mustn't come from behaving, what ever that word stands for if we should analyse it further. It's dangerous to always need to live in a well behaved box. Suddenly your thoughts are not your own and you do things because it's expected from you. Maybe your true nature would take you on another ride, how would you ever know if you spend your life judging other women and yourself? Just because someone's life is different, doesn't mean that their life is neither better or worse.
I wouldn't have meet M for sure if I hadn't tasted life to the fullest that evening. And I wouldn't sit here with this beautiful family if I didn't take a flight to see him, a stranger for me, one week later (with a little persuasion from him maybe). It could have been the worse thing to do, but sometimes you have to take a chance and not behave as you should according to some old fashioned book. It's just two of plenty of fantastic things that arrived to my life in less traditional ways.
I've had periods of my life, and still have from time to time, when I'm living beyond many rules and just follows passion, moments and my feelings then and there. It's when I've put myself in the most outrageous of situations, when you leave your professional personality/motherhood/orwhateveritmaybekindofrole - when I've had the most amazing times of my life and even though I would hate if my children did the same, I know they will create their own path in life at one point or another. God forbid if they ended up without some drama and behaved well all the time. I would have failed in my education and my life advices to them and actually couldn't imagine anything more boring. I want them to be free spirits (which you can allow yourself to be when you are brought up with present life knowledge that always lays in the back of your head) and test what life has to offer out there, with their father and me always being there if necessary. And for sure, when they are older, I will share all of my bad and hidden sides, the darker moments (well maybe not all ...) that will put us all laugning out loud. I'm happy to have shared some crazy ones with the father of my children, he has the craziest of nature when that side settles in - I love that. Life is seldom boring because of it.
With this said, just like everyone else, biggest part of my everyday life I behave perfectly well and love doing so. Family routines, motherhood demands that from you and I love it just as much as my less traditional moments. I need them both to pursue a great balance of wellbeing and satisfaction.
Not long time ago I had a moment like that with my own parents and my younger sister. We had some nice food and a lot of wine, and then we had such a cosy and fun evening. I was surprised to find out how wild they were, back then, but also so happy to feel that they've lived! They did it all, ten times over and are still the best role models one can have. They are just humans with all sides possible.
And some have needs to to things more bold perhaps - so what?
No, some of my best memories - are the ones when I most of the time didn't behave at all. And it's nothing wrong with it at all. It just proved that I dare to live fully out. I'm sure most of you are the same. And if not, then be it!
On the picture you see one of my oldest besties. A wonderful, beautiful woman inside out, full of surprises. She is one of my soul sisters and I love her dearly!
The big difference from living in an apartment smack in Zürich city - is mainly that it was very easy to get ourself out of the apartment for a walk, quick errands or to use the excellent tram system Zürich is providing. That we had it just outside my entrance door, made life very easy and I hardly used the car. Where we live now, in a typical residential area with few buses and trains, I need the car daily and use it at least one time per day. Which means in and out with the children in car seats, packing for a little excursion and not to forget, folding the pram many times per day. With a sibling pram it takes both a little time and space in the car and I felt that I needed a pram that could stay in the car most of the time for things like grocery shopping or just situations when I can have Alexis walking next to me. In other words; for everyday errands!
It needed to be small, neat, practical and just easy to manoeuvre, so I ordered the latest addition to the STOKKE collection, the SCOOT which is exactly that. I took some time for me to decide If I really need it, but oh I love it and it's my best decision ever! And it comes in black and I got the cutest little sleeping bag for him with small dots. You can even put it to sleeping position which is just another genius possibility and something a lot of these more "easy" sitting prams often lacks. But since children takes one or two naps per day, up to the age of three, that is sort of crucial.
When Leon is older, I can also turn the sitting chair so he can sit from the other side and look at the world instead of his mother. But so far he is so small and we can honestly not take eyes of each other quite yet ...
A lovely afternoon with my parents and their grandchildren. (I fell asleep on the floor in their walk in closet, tired? Me? Just slightly ...)
Mum prepared a lovely dinner and dad handled the barbecue at the terrace. After dining, we started to plan our upcoming visit to my sister in BC. Just us females again, like the good old times.
Excited might be an underestimation!
Wearing one of my all time favourite models of dresses. I have them in three different colours and materials now, all from the same designer. Knitted, pink and then, this new one ... dotted. I've worn them un-pregnant and pregnant. It has to be one of the most wearable dresses and I love the straight cut of it which makes it work both with flats but in the same way, high heels and boots. Just like all dresses from Greta.
I wore it today, it's so feminine and cute. I'll make sure to capture it better this weekend.
I've thought about many things this weekend which you may have noticed. Could be because my Dear parents actually took both children one full night, my man took them another night and the third night - they slept rather good and I could even take a nap during daytime. In other words - my brain activity have got some energy and I can finally think again after two month in a constant fog of tiredness, packing, stressing and all that comes when you have two small children by yourself most of the day which on top of that refuse to sleep in the night. Help is on it's way though*.
There is one more topic I'd like to enhance here since I have so many fascinating, clever, interesting, cultural readers from all around the world. I'll taste the subject in my mouth and decide tomorrow or so If I will dare publishing it. But fact is, I've never been afraid to speak my mind and I've always fought for what I believe in. Much less know, for the simple fact that you become less rebelled when you grow older and realise that you don't always need to make yourself heard. Also for the fact that I have less time and energy to dig into subject that appeals me. Well, it all goes together. But sometimes I just can't keep my mouth closed, it's just to much things going on in this world that need to improve. (Let's not get deeper into that ...)
This is by the way what I wore this grey and humid Sunday when my man was working in the house and the children and I where just in the way.
This is the company I promised to tell you about that provide affordable, but very pretty children's furnitures that we got for our oldest son's room! I know that more models are coming in, in about two weeks time, and just can't wait to see those also!
I'll show parts of Alexis' room later this week with the closet and the bookshelf that I bought from here, it's truly to die for and made the room perfect, just the cosy, beautiful, boyish feeling I wanted to create..
I also have to highlight the service they provided. I had some questions about the items and there was a number to call and I got immediate guidance - PLUS, the delivery is included in the price! I received them just four days after making the order and used their service to have someone putting them together for us since my man is working late in the evenings. Now that's what I call excellent service.
One thing you probably don't know about me and that you might think will come as a surprise, is the fact that I'm actually quite economically minded. Well, maybe not in everything, but I want to know what I'm paying for and I hate when someone trying to charge a stupid amount of money for something that should be cheaper, for free, included or with more value for money.
This is something I notice more and more and it's very disturbing. I have so many examples and hardly know where to start, but to give you an example:
A company that was delivering one furniture (a very expensive one to start with) also wanted to charge 2500SEK (300Euro) for the delivery for a couple of kilometres. I mean, that's just so insane and If the company would have been service mined enough or cared for customer satisfaction, they would charge no more then the standard cost for a big furniture to be delivered and charged a normal sum which is about 870SEK or actually stand for it themselves. Things like that goes on my nerves, when there's no logic behind it and when you have no option as a client since you need it to be delivered.
Another thing is the healthy food industry. One example that came across my life the other day were these health snacks. I mean, I wanted to buy a healthy bar for Alexis and me. A small one, the size of about 28gr cost between 39SEK- 45SEK (about 6-7 Euro). And when you look at what it actually contains, it's dates, nuts and some coconut. Isn't that insane? Just to prove how little it would cost to make it myself and how easy it is, I took my oldest and we made these absolutely mouth watering healthy little bars for less then 1/10 the price. It took about 10 minutes and they can be keept in plastic folio for a couple of days and is perfect as a between meal or when the temptation of something more chocolate is knocking the door.
How the professional painter and wallpaper guys works and charge also surprised me. We wanted a very good one since we special ordered hand printed wallpaper and very good quality paint. The price per hour for a painter guy is already one of the highest paid in Europe with 390SEK/hour, about 450Euro/hour - but on top of that, we got a bill on 10 000SEK for all the material (the wallpaper, paint etc we had already paid for ourself) used as protection, like papers to protect the floors, knives to cut etc etc. I mean, isn't that to be included in the price? It's if I, when I was working in my practice, charged my patients for the surringe, the needles, the cotton pads for the blood, the disinfection liquid ... Of course not, it's a part of my tools to make a good job. I don't understand it. It's bananas.
I know it sounds insane when I easily can buy a very expensive bag or piece of clothes, but nevertheless, you have to be aware of what's going on around you and make up your own value for things. A delivery with a couple of kilometres will never be worth 2500SEK in my head, it's actually rude to try to charge that and a healthy bar containing some dates and nuts will neither get paid that sum from my pocket if there's not an emergency in insulin drop down. It's simply so stupid. The often asked for price for a simple coffee is the same, especially in Zürich and when you know how little the actual value is for the coffee beans and some boiled water, I don't know if it's me who is stupid buying it or those who sell it.
What do you have to say about it? Would be interesting to hear your view. I love spending money when I think I get value for what I buy, either it's a service or a item. But often you pay so much for nothing! Money that I rather put on more fun things.
So these healthy bars I just did with a mixer and added some dried (but soft and sweet) dates -(don't forget to take out the seed), peanuts, walnuts and bio cacao powder. Try it yourself, they are so delicious!
I surprised my man yesterday evening with cocktails, dinner and a classic "going out" night. We meet up with one of our favourite couple here in Stockholm and had a blast with them. The rule was, since they also have two small children - not to talk about kids or family life.
We dressed up and took a taxi in to the city. But oh Lord, what a depressing thing to "go out" in Stockholm. It's even worse then when I still did go out in the weekends, long before I meet M. Stockholm is pathetic in this sense, I know it's sounds harsh but seldom do you see so much sad people, all dressed the same, with this sort of desperate hunting, too tipsy, too boring and let's not even mention the sad, sad atmosphere. No one seems to have fun, it's more about prove some sort of proud point of ones existence with jealous eyes looking at each other rather then give away a smile. It's such a difference vibe from, let's say, the more southern European cities and I remembered why I stopped going out in Stockholm and only went out when being abroad.
Yesterday I witnessed that It's not even the same as I recall it - it's worse! I was more happy to have a family and to have my well dressed, gorgeous, international man then ever! I truly felt like we were so wrong among this crowd. Sorry Stockholm's night life, but you wont see much of me out there! I'll rather spend my money on a trip and enjoy the social, fun and more life loving surrounding - breathing an open minded, international feeling elsewhere or simply just arrange lovely dining and wining at our own and friends place!
It truly don't feel like people is getting out to have a fun time. It feels like a charade, a show off in up nose attitudes (I guess they are so insecure and don't really like it either and this appearance is just the easiest to put on) and when I complain about how people dress, it's to say that either they dress like all young bloggers our there with a lot of latest trends (but who cares when everyone adapts them clonal?) or to "naked/sexual" at a too old age (I love a mix of ages, but more when you respect yourself and have a more sophisticated sensualism then just getting your decollate in someones face, that stands for all ages by the way) or just don't care at all. I also feel like people are afraid to stand out, be personal and embrace the variety and to make an effort to the ambiance.
For me, and again this is my blog and my personal opinions, I get drastically tired and bored of a view like that. I love being outside Sweden for that fact, where I find people indulge more in vivid styles, elegance, true fashion, colours, to who they are, with great personalities not seldom packed in a yet so personal and unique style, either you go for elegance, bohemian, classic or I don't know what.
I would chose odd and different any minute over boring, clonal and doll.
Ps: ... and to write a small conclusion: I would actually totally accept all ways of dressing, if people where social, well behaved, interesting, polite, respectful, fun and looked like they had all the fun in the world and spread the love around. Ds
How wonderful, refreshing and tempting isn't the fact that all of our favourite brands are announcing their spring collections as we speak? I just so happen to get four new Greta-items for the season ahead and will probably get some more when they arrive! Since I saw some of Greta's creations on the runway, i just haven't got them out of my head. If everything goes as planned, I might just slip into one of the things this weekend! Stay tuned!
I'm trying to neglect the hard work it truly is with two children at home by myself - and just indulge in the both reliving and sad truth that it will end in less then three weeks. Alexis will start kindergarden and it will be me and little Leon at home. Well, little and little, Leon is growing like a lion and is far more developed then Alexis in this age. Perhaps because he sees his wild brother playing around and going bananas at home?
He is eager to learn, move, see, explore and just take on the world like a lion. He is still a little sunshine most of the days, but like all children, going through these quite frustrating faces. But I've stoped breast feeding now completely and enjoying the fact that I can teach him how to enjoy and find out all the new flavours this life has to offer.
He loves to sit in this chair, and even for smaller children it's perfect with the belt and the padded inside which makes them sit safe and stirdy. And like all things from STOKKE, it's so nice to look at. Sober, elegant and just stylish in the way it's developed. The seat that I showed a couple of days back, we used in the beginning on top of it so that Leon could take part in our dinner rituals and in the same hight as the rest of us. But now he want's to sit and so be it. The adjustable table is also so smart, becaus all that banging with the spoons have got our kithcn table quite damaged from Alexis.
Status at home.
My boys are recovering from a cold and like always, I got a hint of it. But today we're excited never the less since Alexis will get new adorable furniture's to his boy room! Can't wait to show you later. Leon's set we bought in Switzerland, and just like in most European countries south, they have mind blowing things to decorate with!
I've found it very hard to find beautiful, stylish and functional furnitures here in Sweden for children, without paying like 16.000SEK for a closet which I find insane. So I can't wait to share this newly found place with you since I know there's a lot of people like me out there who want a beautiful room for the small people in our lives.
Ohh, my little man, my little buddy, my little soulmate. I love him so much. He will start kindergarden in mid Mars and as hard as it can be, having both kids at home - my God will I miss him during daytime probably. He will not go full time and on Fridays he will be at home with me and Leon, but nevertheless his presence will be lacking.
He looks so grown up in these pictures, posing in his new super cute sweater from one of my favourite boy brands, Marie Chantal.
Two of my absolute favourite girls in this world. One of my oldest girl friends (also Alexis' God mother) and her daughter, my God daughter. In that sense, I'm thrilled to be back in Stockholm. Hanging with them and being a part of little Olivias life is pure happiness! And who else am I suppose to spoil with beautiful little dresses, hair bows and other girly stuff, if not her? Just take a look at the chic little leopard skirt I got her, how adorable is she?
Finding a winter jacket for the swiss alps was a harder task then I could ever imagine. Sure we all love Moncler, Fjällräven and other brands for that purpose, but face fact - everyone wears just those brands and I wanted something different. I had my stylish little fur jacket when I went skiing, but honestly, it was quite cold from time to time. So when I found this jacket from the line called Branta, a more exclusive side from the well known Canada Goose, I was thrilled.
The model i long, which makes it suitable for dog walks, power walks and just outdoor playing around with the children, but also everyday life when the temperatures drops. I love how simple it is, black, no big brands everywhere, cashmere details and small, black fur details. It is also slim and feminine with well though through, in built gloves for the hands and have a hood to be used when necessary. In other words, just a perfect jacket for us women who are always cold, but still want to look nice and pretty.
Finally my man came back home after being away the whole week. I will try not to complain too much about my sleep or the lack of energy, but two kids by myself all day long, in the evenings and in the nights ... I'm just saying: two kids needs two grown ups for sure!
I love them too death, but it is the hardest job ever!
So I might be suffering from severe lack of sleep. Alexis is still up in the night and so is Leon. They end up with me in bed and of course wake up each other while doing so. It feels unrealistically chaotic and the nights have turned into something I hardly look forward to. I know it will change, but sleep is so crucial, I'm the worst of humans when not getting enough.
Anyhow I - This too will pass and when "Googeling" and reading about this sort of problematic toddler sleep, it seems more common then uncommon? Please share with me how it is for you and what you do when your toddler wakes up in the night and don't want to go back to sleep. Do you allow them in your bed? Are you hard on them or just let go for what they want?
Alexis never want to go to sleep either in the evening, but that's another story.
Anyhow II - There so much exciting things going on also. I hope I've manage to answer all of your emails now about meeting up?! Please excuse me if i missed someone, email me again if so. I'm more woozy then ever so I might just have done something foolish out of confusion or tiredness.
The house is slowly but surely starting to look like a home and more and more things are coming together.
I got this good looking baby product delivered the other day. We had my old one, but this one is so much prettier and looks amazing in our kitchen area. It's a new chair from STOKKE, my favourite brand fro children. Even this time they just nailed it. It can be adjusted to sit or lay down and it's soft and very functional. And! So good looking which is important since it stands in the middle of our home!! It can also be put on to a normal eating chair for a toddler so that Leon can be a part of us while eating. How smart?
It was two extremely exhausted parents who had a lunch date in the city today. Our oldest is awake about three times per night and don't want to fall back to sleep ... No explanation further I guess. It can take the best out of anyone to have to struggle with a persistent toddler at 2am, 4am and 5.30am ...
At the moment I just feel like I just cant take being home with both children anymore. It's too intense, too much chaos, too much whining and I feel like I can't give any of them enough. All I do all day long is saying "No Alexis, don't touch Alexis, leave it back Alexis, stop it Alexis" ... and Leon is crying as soon as I put him down from my arms. I'm just very, very tired and feel like everything I want to do, is such a mission. Just getting two small children food, changing diapers, folding the pram, getting them out in the car, putting them both in the car seat with the winter clothes etc ... It takes so much energy. Which I absolutely don't have at the moment.
Anyhow. Happy Valentines day everyone and talk soon again!